Thursday, August 17, 2006

damn that "supernova" show!!!

It's been a few weeks and I'm still watching that damn "Rockstar: Supernova" show. A few things have crossed my mind while watching this:

a) Every guy tries to sound like Eddie Vedder or, to a lesser extent, that douche from Creed.

b) All the girls except for Zayra, the Latin Bjork, sounded the same: husky as shit.

c) Jason Newsted is probably the only redeemable member of the band.

d) Lukas Rossi looks like a Garbage Pail Kid come to life and his name should be Lukas Puke-Ass:

Last night they kicked off Zayra, the only contestant who was worth a damn; not because she's hot, but rather because she didn't come off like a overtly pretentious karaoke singer who had clearly been influenced by two decades of MTV and a feeling of self-importance. All the contestants -- in one way or another -- are fucking idiots. Even my personal favorite, Magni, exhibited levels of douchebaggery by stating that Radiohead's "Creep" was his generation's anthem (or as he put it, their "Satisfaction"). That sentiment told me two things about Magni: one, he must be a lot older than me, since "Creep" was a hit when I was 11, and two, he had never heard "The Bends."

Also, I wonder how, if at all, "Rockstar" is rigged. They've kept on some of the sorriest sacks of shit for weeks: Patrice Pike, a Hooters waitress who couldn't sing her way out of a paper bag; the afforementioned Lukas, a wannabe hipster (or as my wife and I like to call him, "Aiden"); Storm Large, who is really a giant pair of breasts with a smoker's voice; and Toby, who is only likeable because he's like an Aussie version of Stifler from "American Pie."

The way I see it, the only people who have a shot to win this stupid contest are Magni, Ryan Star, and Dilana. Magni because he can sing, Ryan Star because he's the only guy there who looks like he belongs in a band with Tommy Lee, and Dilana because she's so full of herself that she'll probably shoot everybody else so she could win.

Of course this entire post begs the question, "Why the fuck am I still watching this show?"


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